12 Days of Christmas :: Blogs

Day 5 :: I am grateful for adoption blogs.

For the past 21 months I've been a borderline blog stalker on several adoption blogs. My Google dashboard should have really become my home page. I am profoundly grateful to have followed the journeys of those who've gone before us in the adoption process [especially Ethiopia] AND those who are walking in tandem with our journey.

I've been amazed at the bond that's formed with women I've never met from all corners of the country because of our shared excitement, anxiety, waiting, joy, and confusion. We "get" each other in a way that I've desperately needed. It's incredible to read another adoptive mommy's blog and think "I couldn't have said it better" or "that's unequivocally how I'm feeling right now" or "I've been in that exact place". I'm still amazed when another adoptive parent I've never met will comment on our blog [or Twitter] that they entirely resonate with what I've written. I'm crazy excited because I get to meet a couple of those women in Ethiopia next week that I've been blogging and email friends for over a year.

One of those friends, Laura, is also adoptive mommy 2 little boys and we got on the wait list on the exact same day [10/20/09] and they live just 45 minutes from my parents in another part of the country. I very well may burst into tears when I meet her because we've shared so much of our story together...just all via social media.

I don't know what adoptive parents did before blogs burst onto the scene. On this day of Christmas I'm so grateful for blog friends who've been traveling companions on this remarkable journey!

Judah and Addise New Digs

I know you've waited for pics of Judah and Addise's room, so here ya go along with some commentary so you know how special this room really is.

Comment #1 :: This room has laid dormant and barren for over 2 1/2 years since my brother and his wife moved out. It's been at times a daily reminder of the babies that yet to fill that space. It's also been a great workout room! We'll miss that. :)

This is a head on view to the heart of the room.

Comment #2 :: While we were in Ethiopia, our dear friends Tony and Erin did an extreme makeover to our formally army-green empty space. They were over until late one night 2 nights before we left on our first trip. Brian and I were still deciding colors and fabrics and Tony and Erin helped work their magic. We trust their design skills implicitly and they know our style, so it was the BIGGEST GIFT IMAGINABLE to have them own the re-design!!! A slew of Newsong family came over to help transform the space while we were loving on our babies.

Comment #3 :: Tony free-hand painted the animals on the wall. His daughter painted the letters in their names.

Comment #4 :: You may notice how many books we've accumulated already. Brian and I are major readers and can't wait to read them stories. These books are predominantly classics, adoption-focused children's books, Biblical narratives, and Ethiopian stories. My mom's already decided that for every special event, she's purchasing her grandchildren a book and signing a note in it. Lovely.

Comment #5 :: You may notice on the top shelf of the cubby on the right is a book my sister-in-law made for us called "Welcome to the Family Judah and Addise". Included in this book are pictures and letters/prayers from both sides of my extended family for Judah and Addise. Needless to say, it's a most prized gift. I SOBBED as I read every word from my precious, long-distance family.

Comment #6 :: This is the view of the room from the doorway. My mom and Grandma Getz bought us the glider to enable bonding with our kids at all hours of the day or night. The woodland bird curtains were tediously sewn by my friend, Christina, who is terrified of birds. She used every square inch of fabric I ordered! One of the blankets over the glider is from my friend, Dana, from New Zealand.

Comment #7 :: The crib was purchased by a number of Newsong friends, and the dresser was purchased predominantly by another adoptive family. The African stockings were given to us last Christmas by Brian's mom. The piggy bank was painted by Erin for a donation shower she helped throw for us in June 2009! The canvas corkboard was designed by Shannon and included a beautiful touch of their pictures and initials! [NOTE: the dumbbells will be in the room until the last possible minute]

Comment #8 :: The lion over Judah's bed is a beautiful illustration of the meaning behind his name. The Acacia tree in the corner is one of my favorite images of Africa. Judah's duvet cover was sewn by Shannon!! Judah AND Addise's mattresses were given to us by Doris.

Comment #9 :: A view into the massive, double-mirrored closet. A "stranger" from another church gave us 2 more cubbies that fit perfectly into our odd closet. It makes storage efficient and attractive. We also have hundreds and hundreds of diapers and wipes. That should last us until...

Welcome to Judah and Addise's room. We hope they love it, not just because it's BEAUTIFUL but because it's been formed by countless hands who've prayed them home and loved them since before they even became "Diaz's".

Transitions

Think about the last big move you had [for every member of my family of origin, this is a recent reality]. Stressful? Exhausting? Emotionally draining? Nerve wracking? Time consuming? Yes, I'm sure to most of those feelings and probably a few more.

Now think about being 2 or 3 years old and feeling all of those feelings, but not being able to rationalize it, put it into perspective, articulate your feelings, verbalize your loss and processing, and truly understand what's happening in your world.

That is the reality for kids facing adoption. That is Judah's reality as a nearly 2 1/2 year old little guy who can't speak English, hasn't had parents in a long time, and lives in a very different world that our zip code. That is Addise's reality who's spent the vast majority of her life in an orphanage.

For both of our kids, they are facing their 4th transition in their short lives!! Have you had to move homes 4 times in 1 year? Probably not. Then, throw in the fact that you now how different care takers, nutrition, bed, and surroundings and you'll get a snapshot into the kind of grieving, loss, and transition that our little ones are experiencing. It's unfathomable to me.

As I've been grieving alongside my kids for their transitions and loss, I've wondered how they felt with Brian and I coming to their 3rd home, loving on them for 3 days, then leaving them. Do they understand what's happening? Do they know we are their parents, or do they just think that we're another set of hands to hold them?
I was sharing my questions with another adoptive mom at Newsong whose adopted daughter is an adult and she said something that seared into my heart: there's something different about a mother's and father's touch - they know the difference. I don't know if research and developmental experts would confirm her words of comfort, but I have to believe that there IS something different about the way we held, kissed, and played with Judah and Addise. It seems like a supernatural thing God would do to remind them that we have not left them as orphans [John 14:18].

All I know is that since we've been back from Ethiopia [2 weeks ago today!], I've been praying for their souls to be healed and prepared for another transition AND that we'd get that December 14th Embassy date!!!