An Adoption Prayer

One of the things which needs to be talked about more with adoption are the deep, spiritual wounds our children come to us with. I'm so grateful that before Judah and Addise came home our wise, trusted pastor-friends, Ed and Stephen, taught us what we immediately needed to do with our kiddos.

They taught us about breaking off spiritual curses and generational sin, cleansing their bloodlines, restoring wounds that may have incurred from a traumatic conception, pregnancy, or birth. The impact from not praying through these issues for our kids can be huge! Night terrors, shame-based or destructive behaviors, attachment struggles, food issues, lying, hoarding, lack of belonging, lack healthy emotional reactions....the list is as extensive as the spiritual brokenness.

Many of these wounds can be prayed through simply with a couple prayers sessions. But I don't know what we would've done without this wisdom.

We experienced some of their wounds within the first week of parenting, particularly on our flight home from Ethiopia. Without going into graphic detail, we experienced intense spiritual warfare and activity with one of our kids from the time we entered U.S airspace (literally!) all the way through U.S customs. We couldn't even make it to customs for what seemed an eternity because of the intense warfare. Our child was wailing out of control, thrashing their body, totally hysterical. We were texting family, close friends, and our pastoral connections begging for them to intercede on our child's behalf. Some thing was happening in the spiritual realm that could not be described in human language.

By the time we made it to customs nearly 2 hours later, all four of us were crying as we got our passports stamped and the officer said "welcome home".

Even in recent days we've seen an increase of wounds emerge with one of our kids. The shift of emotional response was clear enough that we were able to identify this as a wound opening from their past.

Two and a half years later we are in the thick of dealing with their trauma again. I don't expect this will be the last time, too. In fact, it is very normative for kids from hard places to surface old wounds when 1) their environment changes, 2) they feel safe to express that pain, 3) they have the resources available for the wound to be healed. I've seen that in my own kids and the research would agree.

Only a couple months ago I came across this prayer. Within reading a few lines I was weeping. I hope you'll find this resource so practical in helping your child heal from their past. With love and prayers as you parent and provide refuge for kids from hard places.

We say to you in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ,
that your life is not a mistake.
God made you out of the love that he is. 
He called you into being at the right time and the right place.
He prepared a way for you and gave his life for you.
You are a privilege, not a burden;
a joy and a delight, not an intrusion.
You belong!
You are a treasure just because you are,
and not for what you can do.
You are one of the Father God's children,
and he delights in you, and we delight in you.

Lord, we ask you to destroy the lies this child has accepted.
We bring them to the cross with every destructive attitude, 
expectation, and personality structure or habit pattern.
We see you, Lord, pouring your love all about the child
breathing a fresh breath of life into his/her spirit,
wrapping strong welcoming arms about the child, 
and inviting him/her to grow into the fullness of his/her own life
restfully as you planned for him/her from the beginning.
We pray that the inner child be enabled to forgive those who wounded him/her.
We also pray that the child himself/herself be forgiven his/her negative responses.
We pour the healing love of Jesus into this wounded spirit like a healing balm.
We ask you to gift                   with a sovereign gift of trust and rest and peace, and 
let his/her entire being be integrated with wholeness and harmony
as (s)he is reconciled to being who (s)he is where (s)he is.

Now, we place the cross of Christ (the stopping place of all sin)
between                    and his/her parents and his/her parents' parents
all the way back through his/her generations
declaring that all of his/her inheritance be filtered through the cross. 
All decendancy of evil, every curse coming to the child
through his/her family line must stop on that cross.
We ask you, Lord, to hide the child in your own heart
and to cast light in the eyes of any powers of darkness
that might attempt to oppress or afflict or prevent his/her life.
We stand in the authority of Jesus Christ against such powers.

Finally, we place a blessing in the name of Jesus on                 's life.
We ask you, Lord, to melt any hardness of the heart,
to strengthen him/her with might in the inner man (spirit),
to enlighten the eyes of the heart,
to draw him/her to his/her destiny and
to place a mantle of protection on him/her.

taken from Family Foundations International


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April L. Diaz

April has been a visionary activist her entire life. She has made it her mission to lead high performing teams and develop leaders in the margins of society while caring for our bodies, mind, and spirit. Secretly, she’s a mix of a total girly girl and a tomboy, and is still crazy about her high school sweetheart, Brian. Together, they co-parent 3 fabulous kiddos and live in Orange County, CA.

REGULATED!

This morning my mom and I went to see Asher. Her first meeting of her newest grandson. :)

Within minutes the nurse told us that Asher's blood sugar levels have self-regulated!!!!!!!!!!!!! His sugar IV was removed and he is now IV free. MIRACULOUS! Somehow between when we saw him Saturday afternoon and yesterday his insulin and blood sugar levels reversed and his body is doing what it's supposed to!!!! I almost lost it. Regulating his sugar-insulin levels was the biggest deterrent to him coming home.

Next Goal: sucking, swallowing and breathing from a bottle 8 times in a row successfully (we can supplement with breastfeeding, too). Today he took 1/2 his feeding successfully from a bottle. The nurses and OT will keep working with him on this combo. When he accomplishes that – ASHER COMES HOME!

I told his doctor today that we've had LOTS of people praying for Asher and he said, "that's good". :) I also informed him that Asher will be coming home before 37 weeks. He chuckled and said "sounds good. Alright." In my momma-opinion, he could come home in the next week. That's my hope.

Keep praying people!

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April L. Diaz

April has been a visionary activist her entire life. She has made it her mission to lead high performing teams and develop leaders in the margins of society while caring for our bodies, mind, and spirit. Secretly, she’s a mix of a total girly girl and a tomboy, and is still crazy about her high school sweetheart, Brian. Together, they co-parent 3 fabulous kiddos and live in Orange County, CA.

Part 1 - What a Weekend!

When I showed up to the hospital on Friday afternoon for my scheduled non-stress test (NST), I had no idea what we were walking into for the weekend. Before I share the facts, I would be remiss if I didn't say a MASSIVE thank you to those who've covered us in prayer the past 7 days. It has been truly unbelievable, unpredictable, and demanding of our greatest maturity.
 
Friday Afternoon and Evening:
Went in for my scheduled NST at 10:40am. What was going to be 40 minutes turned into 4 hours of monitoring my elevated high blood pressure and baby's heartbeat. Within minutes, I was escorted to labor and delivery and admitted for better monitoring.
 
After 4 hours, our baby boy was looking good and my blood pressure somewhat normalized so I was discharged. They required me to do a 24-hour urine collection for testing and also scheduled me for another NST at 3:30pm.
 
Saturday Afternoon to Sunday Morn:  
I cooperated with the doctor's orders and collected my pee (terrible task) and came in for the NST.
After 3 hours of testing my blood pressure was no longer alarming and it looked like I was getting discharged.
 
Then, the doctor abruptly came in an gently announced, "it looks like you've earned yourself and overnight stay with us." Instant, hot tears filled my eyes but I couldn't leak in front of this doctor while she explained "why". A good friend spontaneously hurried over to the house after Brian put the kids down for bedtime so he could be with me. Thanks Robyn and family for your help!!
  • Baby boy had a few decelerations in his heartbeat over the 3 hours. Though my admittance into L&D was for my high blood pressure, I was staying overnight because of concern for his stability!!!
  • I moved into the "high risk" category and was told it'll be one step at a time as to what that will mean.
  • Throughout the night, these heart "decels" happened multiple times and always in conjunction with a contraction. I didn't feel more than a couple of those contractions. They were very mild. But as a result, the doctor told me that I'd probably deliver early; we just didn't know when.
  • We were asked to sign C section consent form if there's an emergency or if he's breach.
  • Throughout the night I was strapped to 6 machines (IV, BP, pulse, 2 fetal monitors, catheter). No sleep for the restless and exhausted. The nurse was in and out all night checking machines, checking blood pressure, taking blood, etc.  Lemme just say that L&D nurses are AMAZING though. Brian's sister is an L&D nurse and I'm nominating her for sainthood now.
  • I was given a steroid shot Saturday evening for baby boy's lung development, in case I have to deliver early.  They gave me another 24 hours after the first.
  • They drew my blood every six hours to confirm the safety environment for the baby.
  • The ultrasound showed that baby boy is 4 pounds 9 oz; he's in the 48th percentile. He looked good! They did an ultrasound on the baby & April could see his fingernails!!  He's got everything at this point; these last 7 weeks are just mainly lung development & weight gain.
  • I was given magnesium sulfate in a drip to help keep my blood pressure down & help baby boy's brain development.  One side effect of this is that it makes you very warm & sticky - very uncomfortable. I felt like I was going to spontaneously burst into flames at points. This is no walk in the park.
  • Throughout the night they had me on an oxygen mask to make sure baby boy's getting plenty of oxygen, which helped when his heart rate dipped.
  • I've asked whether I need to go on blood pressure meds & whether this means bed rest for me.  No answers yet.
  • Brian called Ed Salas Saturday night to ask for some prayer and assistance with my Sunday schedule. Ed was moderating our services at Newsong on Sunday and graciously offered to invite to pray for us. We watched online and I immediately burst into tears with the first song: "Come thou fount of every blessing". ** Take note of our son's name later!!
  • Sunday morning: A good friend came to take care of Judah & Addise this morning; she'll stay til they have their naps; Brian plans to go back & be with them from nap time till bed time.
  • At this point I was hoping for a Monday morning discharge (they already confirmed that I need to stay Sunday night).  
  • My iPhone app says the baby is 19" long now & if I deliver now, he has a 98% chance of survival... and only 12% of babies delivered at this point have severe complications.


As of Sunday Night:

  • When I called my mom, Brian was just leaving with the kiddos to see me. That was water for my soul. I was missing my babies after such an abrupt separation. My mom asked me how Judah & Addise were doing, and I said, "They're doing great... all kinds of people are playing with them!" ...and then I broke down & cried.  
  • A shift in my spirit occurred when Brian reminded me, "We've done this before - we had to leave the kids in Ethiopia for seven weeks - we can do it again..."
  • It was more or less confirmed that I would have a C-section, whenever he was ready to come.  The baby's heart rate decelerates each time I had a contraction, so the thinking was that labor & delivery would be too much stress & trauma on him. Plus he was breach.
  • My spirit surrendered and I said, "We have no control over anything anymore". A C-section was #1 on my list of what to avoid for a number of reasons. But my dogmatism wilted away to obedience, trust, and a deep confidence that God's got this.
  • My blood pressure was been normal for nearly the entire time. The mag-sulfate treatment helped with that.
  • Late Sunday night, the doctor confirmed that in order for me to be discharged from the hospital, she has to have a "clean strip" for 24 hours. A clean strip is basically when his heart rate wouldn't decelerate at all during those 24 hours. At 5pm Sunday, his heart decelerated again - so at this point, 5pm Monday would've been the earliest I'd be discharged.
  • Then, the doctor warned: There is a 50% chance I would have a C section on Monday... if his heart decelerates more, then they will strongly consider a C section earlier.
  • Emotionally, Brian and I were both feeling very good... no stress/not scared/not sad.  We had deep confidence that "God's got this... He started it, He'll finish it."  We had a good measure of strength & peace. God started this whole process six years ago & look what we have today.
  • We talked with the NICU doctor today, and she said that 33 weeks is a good size.
  • Of course, everyone is well aware that every day he's still en utero, the better, but having the baby now is not cause for alarm.  In some ways, having him now would be easier than carrying him full term if things continue on as they have for the last 36 hours.  Obviously, having him wasn't our goal or aim, but if it happens, "it's ok."
  • Meanwhile, our bathroom is under remodel. SERIOUSLY?!?! Brian's begging the contractor to work on it double time this week.  (The initial end date is 1-2 weeks from now.)
  • If the baby is born Monday, I'd be home in 2-3 days and the baby would be a little longer - from a few days to potentially 2-4 weeks longer if there are complications or if he just needs growth time.  It all depends on whether he can breathe, suck, and swallow on his own.
  • I got to eat dinner, Brian helped me shower, and went home around 9pm to get our kids from our friends house. I've been praying earnestly about our kids' sense of security and peace in these days. I think J&A thought they went on vacation with all the friends and attention they had on Friday and Saturday. Thank Jesus!


Words and Prayers We Fell Asleep To:
** that I remembered to save and post

  • We serve a powerful, provident God — no surprises for Him. (my little bro)
  • He's just ready to come. (Maria)
  • A couple L&D nurses who interestingly enough had their babies at 32 and 33 weeks with no complications with the baby and minimal NICU stays.
  • I KNOW you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you, but sometimes with let's say with strong personalities (Which God uses mightily) the strength sometimes is our own pushing through.....and not God's. Just a note to make sure you hand over the control (EXTREMELY HARD I GET THAT) to the wise and remember FACT, FAITH, FEELINGS. Keeping those in order is vital for you and your tiny little baby within. (Annette)
  • "God is our refuge and strength. An ever present help in times of trouble." You are bathed in prayer & covered in love. Your baby is covered in prayer as well. You are an incredible, sensitive, knowing, adaptable, strong, intelligent, resilient, prophetic, faithful, deeply-sensing mom. You & your body know exactly what to do & how to experience this. Each step, each breath, is completely covered with the prayers of the Saints!!! (Becca)


    Sweet dreams and good sleep was in our prayers.  
    But another surprise was in store...
1 Comment

April L. Diaz

April has been a visionary activist her entire life. She has made it her mission to lead high performing teams and develop leaders in the margins of society while caring for our bodies, mind, and spirit. Secretly, she’s a mix of a total girly girl and a tomboy, and is still crazy about her high school sweetheart, Brian. Together, they co-parent 3 fabulous kiddos and live in Orange County, CA.