Letting Go - Parenting 101

One of the hardest things for me in recent months is the reality that our oldest kiddo is alive somewhere in Ethiopia. Who knows where they are living? Who's taking care of them? Is (s)he sick or in need medically? I wonder if their birth momma is alive, or sick, or dying? And then I start wondering about their little brother/sister (biological or not). Is (s)he born yet or still in utero? What's their story with their birth parents? When will they get into a safe orphanage? Who will care for both our babies before we get to bring them home?
For a little while, those questions haunted me. They messed me up and brought me to tears. But I've been learning Parenting 101 Lesson: Letting Go. I've been learning that letting go doesn't mean that I don't care about their well-being. Letting go means that I put my trust in the One who cares the most for them. It means that I believe God will care for them - physically, emotionally, parentally - even better than I will.

Honestly, sometimes it's hard to trust that God will care for them during this waiting period. Not impossible, but hard. But the truth is that even when I have my babies home, it's a false sense of control, security, and power that I can ultimately protect them and care for them. In fact, God their Father and Mother is their Protector, no matter their home or guardians.

These kids are not my own. They are God's. Perhaps it's more obvious in adoption, but equally as true. Brian and I are gonna do our best to take care of them, but we will be learning to let them go every day.


April L. Diaz

April has been a visionary activist her entire life. She has made it her mission to lead high performing teams and develop leaders in the margins of society while caring for our bodies, mind, and spirit. Secretly, sheโ€™s a mix of a total girly girl and a tomboy, and is still crazy about her high school sweetheart, Brian. Together, they co-parent 3 fabulous kiddos and live in Orange County, CA.