Road Trippin'

This weekend we made a rather spontaneous trip to our favorite local destination: San Diego! It was our first family overnight road trip since we came home 3 months ago. Let's call it a first trimester celebration...

We headed to SD with our good friends, Daniel, Cassidy, Cohen and Cami for the Padres baseball home opener. The game was set to start at 7pm, which was a bit crazy considering our kiddos have been on a consistent 6:30pm bedtime. But it was time to party! We hoped for the best, and though our kiddos did GREAT the standard gorgeous San Diego weather did NOT. The game was postponed 30 minute due to a rain delay [it wasn't even raining... SoCal wimps] and after the first inning the rain started coming. Pouring! After 30 minutes hovering under umbrellas, hoping for the skies to open up, we called it quits. Plus it was a chilly 50-something degrees, and as bundled as we all were, we started feeling damp and cold. Judah was fascinated with the rain, after all, he hasn't really seen rain that we know of in his young life. Addise laid contentedly Ergo'd to my chest and eventually fell asleep.

Though our first major league baseball game wasn't a raging success, our first overnight getaway was! We had a stupendous 24-hours away as a family with our friends. Here are a few pics to commemorate this event.

Can I just also say that I'm LOVING our "firsts" as a family!?!?! We love creating these memories together. In the words of my husband, "I LOVE what we're building together."

On the 75 minute drive down. Lovin' the drool.
This blanket and smaller companion were knitted [crocheted?] by one of my mentors, Diane.

I will not be exaggerating when I say she talked and screamed the ENTIRE way down.
Brian and I were hoping for a great conversation, but were drowned by a 1-year old's voice.

"Wassup?" Judah's latest phrase. And his first time in the Joovy Sit 'n Stand. I'm a fan!

Straws make great toys.

Daddy and son at their first baseball game. Judah's asking a poignant questions about baseball.
Daddy's explaining the rules of the game. I'm sure of it.
Dream come true.
*We didn't plan their matching outfits.

A family picture. Addise was fascinated with the jumbo-tron above our heads.

The best is yet to come...

I Love YOU!

My mom can't get enough of videos and pics of our kids. And why should she? We've been trying to make a few videos for just for her, per her request, so the other day I thought I'd put Judah to the test with his first sentence.

Before you take a look, we've been working on saying "grandma" and teaching him how to say "I LOVE YOU" in sign language. He got a little gangsta with it...which makes me a proud mama!

In other news, Judah busted out a few new teeth and more are coming in! He's repeating most things we ask him to say these days including: oatmeal, what's up?, Addise, patience [guess he's been hearing that word a lot!], bath, pee-pee, veggie straws, ball, and home. He's also become really great at saying his own name, which he says excessively and with pride. His vocab is growing leaps and bounds. Hard to believe that only 3 months ago he didn't know 1 English word.

Judah is a mix of the patient, helpful older brother,

and the one who leads Addise astray.

Hopefully, I'll get some more videos of him soon with some other words and sounds he's learned. He's exceptionally proud of his knowledge, but gets a little silly once the iPhone is brought out for performing. He is a goof, and we are astounded at his progress this past month. Happy and grateful!

Full Time

I'm starting back to work full time this week. It's hard to believe that 11 weeks have passed since we left to get Judah and Addise in Ethiopia.

I have to say, I have mixed feelings about being a full-time pastor and a full-time mom. I grew up with a stay-at-home mom. She was ever-present to my needs, always available, packed my lunch before school, was always home after school. My mom is present in my best childhood memories. In many ways, my mom's life revolved around her three offspring. Most of the women I knew growing up were stay-at-home moms. That was my normal. That was the picture I was presented of what a wife and mom did. Period. Several of my best friends today are stay-at-home moms.

Conflict. So you can understand my conflict that that will not be the picture my kids grow up with. I will most likely never be a full time stay-at-home mom. I don't think I'm wired that way. I also whole-heartedly believe that I'm called to this work of next generation and orphan advocacy. I love it. Beyond words. During my 10 weeks of maternity leave, I found myself longing for leadership challenges, meetings, lunch appointments, budget problem solving, event planning, and the like. Yet I also loved staying at home in my pjs and loving on my babies.

Tension. I will forever live in that tension of being a working mom. I've chosen to embrace that tension.

Choice. I'm grateful for the choices we have today as women to do whatever we want. My good friend and mentor, Kara Powell, has privately told me, "I believe you can have it all, but you can't have it all, all the time. Some days you'll be a great mom and a less-than-ideal employee, and other days the opposite will be true." I've found great comfort in that reality. I've already felt that on both sides of the coin. I'm grateful that I'm surrounded by a broad range of womens' working and parenting choices. I've learned what I want from each of them. It's deeply informed the kind of family and life Brian and I have agreed to to live.

Nancy Ortberg has also said something to the effect that "a child cannot find their dreams without seeing their mother live their dream." She's also more poignantly said what kids most need is an obedient mommy. It would be disobedient for me not to do what I do.

This past weekend I left my kids for the first time. For 30 hours. I spoke at an event in Dallas to about 500+ youth workers on what makes faith stick in kids beyond high school. As I traveled and spoke, I felt even more strongly about living in this tension of obediently being the best mom and best pastor I can be. I have to do both. And I believe God will enable me to do it...with lots of grace. Grace for me. Grace for our kids.

I think I'll need to post more on this subject matter. I'm getting LOTS of questions from women who love Jesus deeply and love their kids fully, but are caught in this tension. I'd love to share more of what I've learned, and as I move forward mistakes I'll undoubtedly make. Stay tuned...

So on the days when I can't be with my kids,
I'm grateful to receive pictures from Brian, such as this one,
which include me on the moments that I miss.