Love & Fear & Waiting

Recently, our case manager sent us this email that beautifully describes the adoption process. We are there!

When you distill all the feelings associated with international adoption, it probably comes down to two basic emotions – love and fear. Love for children you have never seen, thousands of miles away, is something that cannot be explained. Fear that it is never going to happen is probably easier to explain. A sense of helplessness, being totally out of control, is common and manifests itself in a myriad of ways.

[from another adoptive mommy's blog]
"Waiting on God isn't to be viewed as an obstruction in they way of the plan. Waiting is an essential part of the plan. For the child of God, waiting isn't simply about what I'll receive at the end of my wait. No, waiting is much more purposeful, efficient, and practical than that. Waiting is fundamentally about what I'll become as I wait. God is using the wait to do in and through me exactly what He's promised. Through the wait He's changing me. By means of the wait He's altering the fabric of my thoughts and desires. Through the wait He's causing me to see and experience new things about Him and His kingdom. And all of this sharpens me, enabling me to be a more useful tool in His redemptive hands."

Expedite

You may have heard that our estimated wait time to bring our babies home is 14 more months. Boo. We don't like that. Our agency is conservatively projecting 5-7 more months until referral and then an additional 6 months until we travel to bring them home. Ugh.
So... We are asking you to pray. My ever-so-faithful-in-prayer mom recently emailed me the following,
Re: waiting room?

"I’ve had one word appear over & over & over since you originally told us that the wait was going to be longer... EXPEDITE. That’s been my continual prayer.

Lord, we want YOUR will to be done; we want the children you have planned for April & Brian. But if there is any way that this can be EXPEDITED, that’s my prayer for them..."

I had another friend email me, "I personally defy time lines; I ask for the impossibles."

We've also heard from our agency that we could be in the "wait room of referrals" anywhere from #3 to #30. In my hubby's words, "3 is good! 30 is not." Therefore, we could get our referral very soon. Or it could be as they expect.

Would you pray that the God who controls all time lines, births, matching of families, and "gotchya days" brings our babies home sooner than expected? EXPEDITE. There are 2 little ones out there who need to be Diaz's. EXPEDITE.

Yet, "not my will, but yours be done."

Safe Faith

I've been thinking more and more about this false reality called "safety and security". We value it as Americans. But I have a hard time seeing how Jesus valued it in Scripture. I don't see why Jesus would give his life so that his followers could be safe. Truth be told: Jesus doesn't value it and he didn't give his life for that end. Safety is pretty counter-intuitive for a Jesus follower.

When it comes to adoption, issues of safety, security, and "right decisions" are at the very center for why not to adopt (or foster!) orphans. I came across this blog, and was really challenged to continue thinking about these issues. Please read "A Greater Capacity".

While I'm ALL FOR listening to the wisdom of case managers, social workers, parents, mentors, and close friends, sometimes that's not the final word of wisdom. I wonder if sometimes our reasons not to do something "extreme for Jesus" has more to do with our rationalizing, over-analyzing, excuse making, and hiding behind our "con" lists. I wonder if our Gospel would become more fully lived out if we practiced making "foolish for Christ" decisions as often as we made decisions in the name of wisdom.

I'd love your thoughts.