Attachment and Consciousness

When we met with our social worker (from Dillon International), she talked about how important attachment is for babies. With biological kids it's easy to take for granted the "givens " in connecting with your newborn - holding them right after birth, repeated kisses on their slimy faces, nursing, middle of the night diaper changes, etc...

With adoption it's more difficult because you have no idea what their life was like from conception until they become a part of your family. It's safe to assume they don't receive the same nurture, connection, and affection that another baby does. So, when that baby enters their "forever family", developing attachment is one of the most important tasks between parent and child. They have to learn that you are their parent - the one who will take care of their basic needs and love them beyond measure.

The other thing our social worker talked with us about is the psychological connection between the development of attachments and consciousness. Kids who don't develop attachments to their mom and dad also do not develop a strong moral consciousness. Fascinating, huh!?! It makes sense though - if you do not develop attachments to another human being, than why would you care how you treat another human being?

This learning has caused me to pray differently for our little one(s). I'm praying for what life is like for them before they become Baby Ethiopia Diaz (with a white momma...what a 3rd culture kid!). I'm praying that quicker than normal that our little one(s) intuit that I'm her momma. I'm praying that God would make up whatever time we've lost from each other, and that a strong bond will form.


April L. Diaz

April has been a visionary activist her entire life. She has made it her mission to lead high performing teams and develop leaders in the margins of society while caring for our bodies, mind, and spirit. Secretly, she’s a mix of a total girly girl and a tomboy, and is still crazy about her high school sweetheart, Brian. Together, they co-parent 3 fabulous kiddos and live in Orange County, CA.