I Love Her Hair!

It may sound silly if you're white [or at least not black], but one of my prayers for Addise is that she would LOVE her hair as she grows up. It is so beautiful and such a display of God's creativity. This video is a fun take on what I hope for my baby girl...

Before we brought Judah and Addise home, I was on a research fury to learn all I could about how to care for their hair. I scoured blogs and asked ridiculous questions to my black friends about what to do and not do. I was determined that my Ethiopian kids would NOT have "white momma hair". My mom thought it was "so like God" to give me kids with different hair than mine because I LOVE hair so much and was thrilled to learn how to care for and style their hair. She was right. I now probably spend more time and money on my kids' hair than I do my own. No joke. I'm obsessed with caring for it, styling it, and learning how to do it better.

One thing I learned very quickly after bringing J&A home was that it's not a "one size fits all" approach. Judah's hair is actually pretty different from Addise's. Seeing that we keep his hair pretty short [for now] his hair care routines are simple, but if we were to grow it out his routine would be different from Addise's. So, the past year I've been a student of their hair - what works and what doesn't and have adjusted along the way.

I've had a few fun comments and questions recent months about Addise's hair because it's so stinking awesome! So, I thought I'd post some thoughts on how we care for her hair. The overarching philosophy I've lived by is using natural, organic products as much as possible. Chemical-ridden products only dry out their hair and frizz their amazing curls.

One of a kind she is indeed. Curls curls curls!
  • Wash - we only wash their hair once a week. Washing more than that dries it out. I've tried a number of products and nothing has earned my undying love and affection. However, I do really like California Baby shampoo and Kinky Curly shampoo.
  • Co-Wash - we co-wash their hair 2-3 times/week, including the day we wash their hair with shampoo. Co-washing is simply washing their hair ONLY with conditioner. Dirt and product build-up will wash out in this process but the conditioner will moisturize their hair. We leave in the conditioner for at least 5 minutes and use a Tangle Teezer before we wash it out to brush out the knots. The best conditioner we've found to date is Bee Mine Avocado Cream. Brian swears Addise's hair has transformed since we've started using it. Also, we only "brush" her hair after we co-wash her hair.
  • Coconut Oil - this is my newest find and I'm WILD about using this on her hair. It's irreplaceable in my opinion AND the cheapest product I've ever used. I use this every morning on her hair after I spray on her detangler. I apply it with my fingers and work through her curls.
  • Blended Beauty - This is my favorite product line. They are natural products and provide a great assessment to discover what type of curls your child has and then recommends products to help their curls. I've fallen in love with their Satin Style reviver [can't find the link]. I use that every morning to detangle her bed head. Again, I only use my fingers to detangle her curls. I also use Butter Me Up [leave-in conditioner] and Curly Cake Shake [leave-in spray lotion detangler] sporadically and without method to my madness.
  • Sleeping Cap - I also have a sleeping cap that we've used at bedtime for her [that we bought from Blended Beauty], but we've had issues with it staying on and stretching out. So, we really haven't used it much in recent days.
  • Hair Cuts - We have yet to give Addise one. Her hair feels healthy and I shutter to think of cutting any curls. Honestly, the only curls we cut are the ones that get too tangled to brush out. Judah gets a short buzz from Brian every few months with our clippers.
  • Styling - her default style is a headband on stay-at-home or rushed days. We have every color in the rainbow, are easy to put in, and keep her hair out of her face. If I want to do poofs [either half-head or 2 pigtails], I normally style after co-washing or put in a LOT of detangler to soften the process. One friend gives her daughter marshmallows when she's styling her daughter's hair. I let Addise brush her own teeth. :) I've found that though sometimes we fight each other through the process, it's become a great way to build attachment with my girl. We've yet to do any braids or twists...I can't bear to contain her curls for now and LOVE her growing fro!

That's our story. I'm sure it'll continue to morph as Addise's hair grows.

Here are some great resources I've learned from in the past couple years:

Just for Fun: I'm not even kidding, Addise whips her hair back and forth like this in the bathtub when her curls are long and wild. She cracks me up!!

Hope this helps! Would LOVE your thoughts, comments, and ideas, too. I love learning and getting better at this.


April L. Diaz

April has been a visionary activist her entire life. She has made it her mission to lead high performing teams and develop leaders in the margins of society while caring for our bodies, mind, and spirit. Secretly, sheโ€™s a mix of a total girly girl and a tomboy, and is still crazy about her high school sweetheart, Brian. Together, they co-parent 3 fabulous kiddos and live in Orange County, CA.