12 Days of Christmas :: Maturation

DAY 11 :: I am grateful for the gift of maturity.

Adopting Judah and Addise has changed my prayer life. And it's changed how I ask people to pray on our behalf. This morning I was reading Exodus 14 and once again God's truth intersected exactly where I needed it.

13 But Moses told the people, “Don’t be afraid. Just stand still and watch the Lord rescue you today. The Egyptians you see today will never be seen again. 14 The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.”

As I read this chapter and cried, I started praying. When I was younger I would pray for things and make decisions to surrender because I thought [at least subconsciously] that if I prayed for the right things, in the right way, and gave up my will to his, then God would give me what I wanted. A+B=C, right? Nope - God cannot be manipulated like that. I've come to believe that as I pray, I am giving up my will to his and he also shapes it to conform to his will. Then, it is well with my soul. Believe me, I would swim to Ethiopia right now if I could [and I might have to with the insane amounts of rain we've had in SoCal!!!!]. But clearly what God's doing is much bigger than I know, and I've seen that clearly in retrospect in other areas of my life. Remember, he gives me what I need more than what I simply want.

EMBASSY UPDATE :: We are still waiting, but humanly speaking it doesn't look good. Essentially, the US Embassy still hasn't given us a green light to travel, and we are running out of time. We have until about 9am tomorrow morning AT THE LATEST to cancel our airline tickets. Our case managers have said that the Embassy wants for all 6 families cases to be resolved before they give any of us an Embassy date and the green light to travel. It doesn't make sense. Our case should be ready to go now. Our agency is petitioning on our behalf with the Department of State in DC. We are waiting for an update.

Please keep praying. I'm a mess, but am choosing to trust in this confusion. Your texts, messages, and prayers have carried our burden with us. Every message, question, and hug has caused me to cry, but it's needed. Thank you.

When I started this "12 Days of Christmas" series, I wasn't expecting this turn of events. It's been quite hard to write these, but it's also forced me to celebrate and be grateful when my heart is heavy and troubled.

One more pic to make you smile...what would you put as a caption to this picture?!?!


April L. Diaz

April has been a visionary activist her entire life. She has made it her mission to lead high performing teams and develop leaders in the margins of society while caring for our bodies, mind, and spirit. Secretly, she’s a mix of a total girly girl and a tomboy, and is still crazy about her high school sweetheart, Brian. Together, they co-parent 3 fabulous kiddos and live in Orange County, CA.